Words—Potent for Good | Advancement Resources

Words—so innocent and powerless as they are, as standing in a dictionary, how potent for good…they become in the hands of one who knows how to combine them.

— Nathaniel Hawthorne, American author

Sharing the vision for your organization, project, or program with donors is one of the most important—and enjoyable—steps in donor engagement. As the recent rise in giving to donor-advised funds indicates, people are uncertain what to do with their money. In order to provide donors with a meaningful and impactful giving experience, describing the vision is a critical step—and it also offers development professionals, leaders, and others the opportunity to speak about something deeply important to them.

As you craft your compelling Opportunity Story for what you want to accomplish, are you choosing the best words to appeal to, inspire, and invite donors to join the cause? The table below shows common word choices and why these might not appeal to donors—as well as alternate choices that can be used to drive meaning and inspire giving.

Common Wording	Help us
In a Sentence	Help us to end hunger.
Why it Doesn’t Work	Implies the donor is not considered part of the team
Better Wording	Join us
Focus on language that emphasizes collaboration, cooperation, and unity. Donors want to be part of the team. The word “join” is more than a request—it is an invitation.

Common Wording	Gift
In a Sentence	Your gift can help end hunger.
Why it Doesn’t Work	Lacks accountability, which savvy major donors desire
Better Wording	Investment
There is a subconscious nod toward credibility when you use words like investment, which clearly implies that you intend to deliver a meaningful return.

Common Wording	Eventually
In a Sentence	Eventually, we can end hunger.
Why it Doesn’t Work	Emphasizes the length of time rather than the outcome
Better Wording	Ultimately
Major gift donors tend to be interested in outcomes. As successful people, donors know that big achievements take time—and they also know the value of focusing on the goal.

Common Wording	Hope
In a Sentence	We hope to end hunger.
Why it Doesn’t Work	Presents project outcomes as improbable
Better Wording	Plan
While hope and action are not mutually exclusive, it helps when sharing a vision to focus on what is possible: specific, planned actions a donor can see.

Common Wording	Society
In a Sentence	Our society can end hunger.
Why it Doesn’t Work	Provides too broad a category
Better Wording	Community
Emphasize inclusivity and a sense of personal ownership by using words like “community,” which also has a warmer connotation than “society.”

Common Wording	Give
In a Sentence	We give food to those in need.
Why it Doesn’t Work	Deemphasizes inherent caring
Better Wording	Provide
Donors tend to be moved by descriptions that emphasize the personal aspects of a philanthropic opportunity. Choose words that are nurturing, not transactional.

Common Wording	Improve
In a Sentence	We improve life for those in need.
Why it Doesn’t Work	Lacks specificity regarding effects
Better Wording	Enhance/enrich
The word “enhance” implies forward progress; “enrich” implies increase of wealth or experience. Both are strong words in a clear vision for support.

Finally, as you share the vision, remember that your personal enthusiasm is essential. When potential donors are passionate about a cause, they will enjoy sharing a mutual passion with you. Whatever words you use, speak with honesty and intentionality, and be encouraged that your words are being wielded for tremendous good.

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